Why I’d Go on a Murderous Rampage
I am not an angry person. In fact, I am pretty much the opposite of violent. There are a few things, however, that might just set me off into a spectacularly destructive rage. As an example, I might just go on murdering spree if the Febreze people ever trap me into one of their commercials.
If I ever deeply inhaled the masked smell of a disgustingly filthy crackhead’s apartment whilst sitting on a seemingly flea infested sofa, I swear to jeebus I would snap.
Every time one of these commercials air, my bf loses himself in a fit of laughter because he can’t help but picture my volatile reaction after I whipped off that blindfold.
I realize that I might face serious jail time for my murderous rampage, destroying everyone responsible for making me hold dirty clothing and furniture to my nose but I think the court of public opinion would find me blameless. You’d root for me, right?